Living Like I’m Dying
— a note for the new year —
Go, eat your bread with joy, and drink your wine with a merry heart, for God has already approved what you do. Ecclesiastes 9:7 (ESV)
A delicious, authentic Italian meal at the best Italian eatery I have ever experienced… found in Edinburgh, Scotland. [The Artisan Pasta Maker] 📸 : Jared Howell
This year my plan is to live a little bit more like I’m dying. Let me explain.
At the start of every new year I spend some time in reflection over the previous year. I scroll through my photos, maybe even click on a memory video or two that my iPhone so generously creates for me. I look back over the calendar year, each season, the excursions, the highs and lows, the growth and setbacks. I think we all do this to some extent. It’s healthy to do, even if “resolutions” statistically go unachieved.
Me? I like to reflect, plan, and make fun little bullet points of my goals. They’ve changed and shifted over the years, but admittedly, I’m still working on many of the same things.
This year, I’m taking a little bit of a different approach.
During the fall of 2025, I sensed the Lord guide me to read through the book of Ecclesiastes. I have described myself as having “a bent toward melancholy” and felt in my heart that reading through this book may do me some good. There’s a book in the Bible with a cynical tone and “What is the point” kind of speak? Count me in!
I remembered that the church I attended when we lived in Frisco, Texas (Grace Church Frisco) went through Ecclesiastes a few years ago in a sermon series. I knew it would be beneficial for me to listen to those messages alongside my reading plan. Boy was that the right move. I can’t recommend that sermon series enough - I think everyone should listen to it! I found myself, after nearly every sermon, proclaiming to my husband, Jared, “If you only listen to one sermon from the series, it needs to be THIS one!” I said that a lot… about pretty much all of them. I’m going to link to the series at the bottom of this post.* I can’t recommend it enough. It was truly life changing.
A key phrase that Pastor Craig Cabaniss used throughout the series was that the author of Ecclesiastes (Solomon - referred to as the “preacher” in the book) was trying to get this simple point across:
“Life is gift; not gain.”
In all of our striving, toil, pain, celebration, highs, lows, growth filled seasons, setbacks… we all actually have the same fate: death. (Happy New Year 😬) But, in embracing the wisdom of Ecclesiastes, that reality is actually freeing. We are free to enjoy the time we do have to the utmost and unto the Lord.
Throughout the sermon series through Ecclesiastes, the pastors shared many examples of how we might go about enjoying our lives — laughing with family and friends, sharing good food and drink, and really just enjoying the days we have. Of course, not every moment is filled with the joyful parts – there’s work to be done… Weeds to be pulled from flower beds, laundry to be folded, lunches to be packed, disagreements to be worked through…. Life is still… life. As Ecclesiastes would put it — toil. Not always fun. Not always enjoyable.
One example Pastor Craig used has really stuck with me. He shared a story of musician/songwriter Warren Zevon’s final appearance on Late Night with Dave Letterman.** Zevon, diagnosed with terminal cancer, was asked on national television how his life is different knowing there really is an end to his days, in comparison to the rest of us who may not constantly live with that reality of our fate at the forefront of our minds. He shared this about his experience,
“Enjoy every sandwich”
That’s it. That’s the tweet.
Something so basic. So routine. But faced with the reality of an end date? To make it to that moment…that’s joy.
How would you live if you knew you were going to die?
We know that in Christ, though we will experience death in this life, we will live forever in eternity - our soul forever alive, our bodies made new.
I love that I finished the book of Ecclesiastes toward the end of the year. It was a great place to launch into 2026 - fully aware of my frailty… ready to live for the moment, for the Lord… plan, yes. Prepare, yes. Make goals, yes. But doing all of this with the heart posture of I don’t know my days, I don’t own my time, it’s in his hands, YET my life is a gift. And I can’t strive enough, force anything to happen, or bring about the best me in 2026. But I can enjoy what the Lord has graciously given me. My kids. My husband. My current season. My hobbies. My business. My friends. A glass of red wine by my cozy wood burning fireplace. The best views at Rocky River Reservation. A slow afternoon fishing. Playing my guitar. Singing the Wicked soundtrack at the top of my lungs with my son Judah. My morning cup of coffee. Reading a good book…
The blessings in my life abound. I want to enjoy them in the Lord, with a grateful heart for how He graciously provided it all. He didn’t have to, but he did.
Right now this life is what I have. I’m going to be intentional with it. I’m going to leave it all out on the field. I hope to enjoy my life as gift, not gain.
I think I’ll start by enjoying my next sandwich.
“What gain has the worker from his toil? I have seen the business that God has given to the children of man to be busy with. He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end. I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil—this is God’s gift to man.
I perceived that whatever God does endures forever; nothing can be added to it, nor anything taken from it. God has done it, so that people fear before him. That which is, already has been; that which is to be, already has been; and God seeks what has been driven away. ”
*Full sermon series from Grace Church through the book of Ecclesiastes
Youtube →
Spotify (first sermon) →
Grace Church Website →
**Link to the interview of Late Night episode with Warren Zevon
Youtube →
